I'm starting to feel like living my life is a chore, one that has to be endured and not enjoyed. That can't be good. It takes a step back to reflect on the bigger picture to realise that there is soemthing more to this life than just living out the responsibilities and should do's that life dictates to us and expects of us.
I always seem to come back to this theme. It got me thinking that this recurring thought must be triggered from my unconscious side to break free of the life obligations that may or may not have been thrust upon me. I don't believe I have overbearing parents who have unrealistic expectations of me. The pressures that I feel are self inflicted and stems from environment, peer pressure and my own silly neurosis.
Perhaps Sylvia Plath is to blame for my current self gloom. I have never looked at life in the negative perspective before and now, I'm trying it on for the first time. Strangely enough (and it scares me too) I'm enjoying this self loathe and misery. It's like revisiting the angst y person I left behind years ago. However, this is a darker, more broody side. One that, if not controlled, could consume me.
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